Saturday, June 23, 2007

Third and Long



The big dummy.

Trouble has found "Pacman" Jones again. Or is it the other way around? Anyway, Ken Ritter from the Associated Press tells us more about the troubled cornerback's journey into the Heart of Dumbness:


Pacman surrenders, makes bail at $20,000
LAS VEGAS — His distinctive dreadlocks gone, Adam "Pacman" Jones posted bail, walked out of jail early Friday and headed home to Nashville, leaving his lawyers to again sort out the legal entanglements of the suspended NFL player.

Jones surrendered to face charges in a Las Vegas strip club melee that preceded a triple shooting. The Tennessee Titans cornerback was released on $20,000 bail, and was scheduled to return for an initial court appearance July 23.

Jones will plead not guilty to two felony charges of coercion stemming from allegations that he threatened to kill Minxx club employees and that he bit a bar bouncer, his lawyers said.

If convicted, the 23-year-old Jones faces a maximum of 12 years in prison and a $10,000 fine.

The arrest was the sixth for Jones since he was drafted in 2005. NFL and team officials declined comment Friday.


I don't get it.

Dumb as he is, I'm sure "Pacman" Jones has figured out that the world is divided three ways: there's the rich, the poor, and the ever-shrinking middle-class (that's one paycheck away from being poor).

Jones is a rich African-American male in white America who loves his job, and he got that way by hurting people for a living. Give the other guy a concussion, get a bonus. Is this a great country or what? Financially, Jones doesn't have to deal with the brutal, day-to-day bullshit that everybody else does. He can buy a car or a house, afford to see a doctor, and pay for his children's college education without a second thought. Jones enjoys a ridiculously opulent lifestyle that ordinary people will never have.

But sometimes, Jones acts like he's trying as hard as he can to throw his hard-earned money away.

The National Football League has an unspoken "nudge nudge, wink wink" policy about the bad boys in cleats who misbehave: as long as you shut up and do your job, we'll look the other way. Keep your business on the DL, alright? When Al Davis said, "Just win, baby", he just wasn't speaking about the Oakland Raiders. But what pisses NFL commissioner Goodell off is when jerks like Jones get busted in public for being dumb, and ESPN lets everybody know about it the next day.

The Tennessee Titans are fed up, too. Coach Jeff Fisher refuses to comment any further about Jones, and quarterback Vince Young said, "I haven't talked to him. I love him a whole lot, but like Coach said, it's Pacman's issue...he's got to take care of his problems."

If "Pacman" Jones doesn't wise up soon, his problems are going to take care of him, and it'll be his own damned fault. Just another loser of an ex-football player living in a dump.

Dummy.

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